Funky New Year (2018 Remaster)

HAU`OLI MAKAHIKI HOU

 

Heart & Friends Christmas, Home for the holidays - The Complete Show

Dec. 11th-17th is my 20 yr Anniversary in Hawaii

 This week is my 20th anniversary – cumulatively – of living in Hawaii.

In 2002, I left the Bay Area on a rainy, gloomy Friday the 13th morning. It had been a hard several years. Between my father’s unexpected death, a marriage I had reluctantly found myself in and wanted out desperately, I am an alcoholic and knew it even then and that lead to 5 hard core years of cocaine use and was oh so very tired. I had been couch surfing my last month at friend’s places or at times just passing out in a park, bushes, or strangers. I was very sad and I thought I was going to kill my husband or anyone that crossed me. I had enough of stagehands, drug dealers, opportunistic men and people who just sucked the life out of me. Sure, much was my own undoing, but grief is a mother fucker.

When the opportunity arose from a friend to come to Kauai, HI. I jumped. I had never been to Kauai. I just had a moment of clarity as many alcoholics do when they realize that it’s time to change their life. I packed up and left my very skeptical husband. “You’ll come back, they always come back!” he exclaimed to me right before I left. I was like” Fuck you, I am out.” One good friend took me to the airport on this rainy December morning in 2002. I cried as I sat down in my airplane seat feeling much like the inclement weather outside.

I was on Kauai from 12/02-12/16 and in that time, I healed, thrived & learned so much about myself. I am going on 19 yrs of an alcohol-free life and no more cocaine as well. Reignited my theatre passions, worked for some incredible nonprofits and had some opportunities that would’ve never surfaced had I not invested in myself. I then tried to invest in my relationship at the time, and I moved to Maui 12/16-8/19. When folks that live here say that each island is different, it is so true. I became frustrated in my own unmet expectations of myself and the relationship. I was trying to connect with folks on Maui and enjoy the upcountry beauty that island provides. I became unsettled and bored. I went to stay in Denver for 9 months w my brother and his ohana.

I came back to Kauai in June 2020 & after 2 wks of quarantine because of the COVID restrictions, I had 6 days & shattered my right ankle going down to Secret’s Beach. It has PROFOUNDLY changed my life.

What has Hawaii taught me?

My Top 10 List:

1. Gratitude – let’s say I’ve found that gratitude is a living organism.

2. Beauty - I am surrounded by it but if you don’t consciously recognize it every day, it doesn’t matter where you stay.

3. Frugality – you seriously don’t need a lot of $$$ to live, even all the way the hell out here in the middle of nowhere. Now this depends on children and your comfort level of how you want to live. I have no children and I don’t need much to be comfortable.

4. Connection – there are more nonprofits in the 808 than probably anywhere else. It’s up to you to find connection, no matter where you live, if that is what you seek.

5. Be cognizant of the host culture – study Hawaiian culture, not just the history but the local way of living, when you are haole it will carry you leaps & bounds if you are respectful.

6. Solitude – if you want to be left alone, Hawaii is the place. I mean I have friends on the west side of the island of Kauai that I hardly ever see! LOL! Also, much of my family/friends on the mainland have yet to visit me. Remember we are the most isolated island chain in the world. You can’t just hop in your car and drive to another state or county for that matter.

7. ALOHA is something that is lived every day

8. You better like bugs/ocean/jungle as that is what lives here. I had to learn to not freak out about those insanely big cockroaches

9. Food – I am not wild about the local diet, but I am wild about the abundance of fruits/vegetables and have recently realized what a food snob I am. Vegetarian & organic is best.

10. I wanna die here. I have dreams of traveling to France but for the most part, I could just die here & have my ashes scattered in the Pacific.

Mahalo nui loa kakou – Thank you to everyone that has helped me in the 20 yrs. that I’ve lived out here, so many to thank. I just want to say to all of you, follow what you believe is right for you! Living out here has been the best of my life! It’s not for everyone and I won’t say it’s been all shakas & anuenue. Many times, it’s been some hard life lesson stuff. I am just in awe of the fact that I am alive, that I am in this incredible, fantastical place that is Hawaii nei.

Ua mau ke ea o ka aina i ka pono which mean "The life of the land is perpetuated in righteousness."

: by RM Polihale State Park, Kauai, HI - NYE 2011

RIP John Lennon 12/8/80

 

The Christians and the Pagans - Dar Williams

Blessing for the Solstice

 

Excellent Photo of Big Island - Mauna Kea & Mauna Loa